“Jesus cried out in a loud voice, ‘Eli, Eli, lemasabachthani?’ which means ‘My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?'” Matthew 27:46

The event happened a long time ago when I was a young boy. But the imprint of the memory remains as fresh as yesterday. We were visiting friends of my parents out of state. Being bored and looking for something to do, I saw a wooden go-kart sitting in their garage. How could I have known it would transport me to a place I would never forget?

I remember sitting in the go-cart on a downhill slope of a driveway. But it wouldn’t roll! When I began to rock back and forth to force it into action, my head hit a corner on the wooden frame. Instantly blood poured into my eyes and I screamed, mostly out of fear! EVERYONE heard me and soon we were rushing to the hospital.

I really don’t remember any pain. But when the doctor said I needed stitches and pulled out a huge syringe to numb my forehead… I freaked and tried to get off the table. I was subdued quickly and placed on a rolling stretcher moving toward the emergency room. Trying to get off of that, they strapped me down to hold me still. Looking at my dad, they blocked him from coming along with me!

I will never forget my fear, or the look on my father’s face, as the doors closed between the both of us. I cried out “Daddy, Daddy… don’t leave me!” But struggling, I could not move! Strapped to the gurney to hold my head still for the needle, the last thing I saw before the doors closed were tears running down my father’s face.

Maundy Thursday is a big day for me because it forces me to remember my own horrific event. Then I think about Jesus and His prayerful agony in the Garden of Gethsemane, as He begged His Father to not leave HIM. For the first time ever, He was about to experience separation from His Father. He was going to have to trust that His Father would be there… afterwards.

What if something had gone wrong and the prophecies could not be fulfilled. What if His enemy satan actually got a leg up and His sacrifice wouldn’t be good enough? As He felt His Father backing away, and remembering the betrayal of Judas, He HAD to wonder. How could He be sure this would all work if even His own Dad turned his back on Him?

Back at the hospital after the stitches were finally in, I was exhausted from crying. I was rolled into a room where visitors were allowed… and my dad was the first. We hugged at the reunion and I was overjoyed that he hadn’t abandoned me after all. But we were changed by the event. He preached that experience at many ‘Good Friday’ services. Now I do the same.

Things have changed in medicine since then. Now parents are welcome in the room with their children. I remember sitting with mine for stitches, grateful that they would never have to endure that feeling of abandonment and fear. But I am also strangely grateful for my own experience… because it helps me realize the tremendous price both God and His Son had to pay for me to be saved. Deep down, I never really feel like I’m worth it! But knowing the cost and God’s willingness to pay for me makes me love Him all the more.

So on this Maundy Thursday, I ask this question… will YOU betray the one who paid so much for YOUR redemption? And after what He did for you… what will YOU do for HIM?